Everyone assumes goal starting is just making a list of tasks they would like to get done, but it is more than that. Goal starting is not just checking off items, but instead is the beginning steps to a whole new you. Starting goals is always difficult in the beginning. Why? Because it is binding. It is taking responsibility for every action you take moving forward, instead of just living life on autopilot. Goal starting is somewhat akin to marriage, where you will enter into a contractual agreement; whether it be a new career, a new business or a health regime, you are agreeing to take on your objective for better or worse. It is a commitment to change.
But are you ready to commit?
In the beginning we are. We get excited about the opportunities that lay before us. There is so much momentum before you begin but when it's time to execute there is this small paralysis that takes hold of you, a form of performance anxiety that beckons you to hide instead of tackling your challenge head on. Unfortunately, enthusiasm and daydreaming can take you so far. But it's putting yourself out there that is the big challenge. Standing bare before the world, screaming, "Here I am!! Come see me!!" But who will the world see? Who will you become?
Let those questions sink in for a moment...
Starting something means changing and this change means letting go of an old self, and owning a new you. This old you has provided nothing but complacency and stagnation, it has kept you from accomplishing important life goals, goals that could have led you to a new happier life.
Committing to starting will change you. You will become a new person, a person with a plan, dedication and purpose. And a person who will face a lot of fear, because change and fear walk hand in hand. Because fear will tell you not to change, that it is not worth it and what if I can't live up to this "New Me".
So how do we do it? I offer the following steps to help.
Say good-bye
Stand in front of a mirror and look yourself in the eye and say, "Today I will commit to starting, and this will be the beginning of a new me, so today I say, "GOOD BYE" old self." This process is akin to setting your life to an intention.
It is bidding farewell to the inactive part that is frozen in fear and accepting the new you who will welcome change, and become the new proactive self worthy of achieving. Now this exercise is best done standing in front of a full length mirror, although any mirror will do. It will be uncomfortable at first, and that is natural, so don't fight it. So take a couple of relaxing breaths and trust the process.
State your choice
Stop weighing the pro and cons of starting, this will leave you stuck for a very long time. Do or don't do, but be ready to own that choice, even if its choosing not to start. Now remember the hidden gem in this step is you have been making a choice to live everyday. By getting up, no matter what hardships awaits you in the outside world, you decide everyday to face it. And in essence you make a choice, just accept that you are making it.
Define a purpose
Identify what you want to contribute to the world. Live a passion that you find is bigger than yourself. Write it down on a large piece of paper, and hang it up where you will see it everyday. Place this new dedication in front of you, so that you see it everyday, and make sure you are living it. Seeing this message will bring a big motivation to your life.
Set specific goals
Goals are the great unseen motivator of our world. Goals give us shape, they define who we will be. Goals that are directly in tune with your outlined purpose will help build sustained motivation and productive momentum. But for goals to be truly effective, they must be specific. Setting specific goals gives you structure, a map to guide you to what you set out to build.
Stay focused
We live in a world of constant distraction and activities that vie for our attention. Every moment of every day there are new virtual toys that are begging for our attention. In the age of new connectivity, there is demanded time to share, like and post your way to simulated connection. Instead of virtually living your life, learn to live present in your life. Turn off, unplug and disconnect.
Look for teachers
Connect with people who add value to your life. Work on strengthening and nurturing bonds of human connection. Build a community of trusted friends/mentors who will provide real world observations and education to help make you a more rounded individual. Also, stay curious about people, study people around you, learn from anyone who can help you along your path of intention.
These are just a few suggestions to assist you. I hope they serve you well.
Ed